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» Site title: המסך המפוצל » Site description: ביקורת סדרות טלוויזיה, המלצות יומיות לצפיה, סיכומים שבועיים ופרויקטים מיוחדים.
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» Site title: וואלה! טלוויזיה » Site description: מדור הטלוויזיה של פורטל-העל "וואלה". מאמרים וטורים אישיים על כל מה שקורה בטלוויזיה, מדרוג תוכניות שבועי וחדשות.
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» Site title: טלוויזיה » Site description: תת-האתר של Ynet. מספק חדשות, ביקורות ועדכונים על כל מה שקורה בעולם הטלוויזיה.
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» Site title: טלויזיה מעורבת באינטרנט » Site description: האתר משדר סרטי וידאו בסטרימינג בנושאי חברה, סביבה, מוזיקה, וידאו ארט, זכויות אדם ונושאים נוספים.
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» Site title: פנאי פלוס » Site description: תקצירי סדרות, מידע על כוכבים וראיונות מיוחדים.
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» Site title: רייטינג » Site description: אתר הבית של מגזין הטלוויזיה והבידור מבית "מעריב" מציג כתבות מן העיתון עליהן ניתן להגיב, לוח משדרים והמלצות.
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Randomize humor
Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat.
The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat.
The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook,
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy and I in the nude,
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube.
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner, and momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we''d built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangey reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of the sled,
A sock in his ear and a bra on his head.
Sure as I''m speaking, he was high as a kite,
And he yelled to his team, but it didn''t sound right.
Woa Shithead, woa Asshole, woa Stupid, woa Putz,
Either slow down this rig or I''ll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don''t hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, ''cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jockies, to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I''ll just stay awhile"
He walked to the kitchen for himself poured a drink,
Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee,
The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa''s next find,
And six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several more things I shouldn''t even mention.
A fuck ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
And a dildo so long that it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain''t for kids, Mrs. Santa will shit,
So I''ll leave ''em here, and then I''ll just split."
He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug stuck under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took reigns of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home, Rudolf. This night''s been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout,
"The best thing about pussy is you can''t wear it out!!"
Humor of the day
The top 10 inventions by Blondes:
1) The water-proof towel
2) Solar powered flashlight
3) Submarine screen door
4) A book on how to read
5) Inflatable dart board
6) A dictionary index
7) Ejector seat in a helicopter
8) Powdered water
9) Pedal-powered wheel chair
10) Water-proof tea bag