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» Site title: Artnodes
» Site description: Estudia i impulsa les interseccions de les arts, les ciències i les tecnologies com a noves formes d’art emergent. Articles, entrevistes i agenda.
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» Site title: Ciència i tecnologia
» Site description: Col·lecció de títols sobre la temàtica en català. De la Fundació Videoteca dels Països Catalans.
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» Site title: Fitec - La recerca a l'abast de l'empresa
» Site description: Punt de trobada on els científics i creadors de noves tecnologies posaran a disposició dels empresaris i inversors totes les innovacions del sector.
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» Site title: Fundació Joan Oró
» Site description: Institució privada amb l'objectiu d'impulsar la investigació científica i tècnica. La fundació, el Dr. Oró, activitats, notícies i enllaços.
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- Grec - Aplicació de gestió de recerca de la Universitat de Barcelona, amb bases de dades, entorns de suport i programes d'explotació.
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» Site title: Oficina de Suport a la Recerca - OSR
» Site description: Novetats, personal, tasques, programes nacionals i internacionals, beques, mobilitat d'investigadors, gestió de currículums, reparació i reposició. De la Universitat de les Illes Balears.
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» Site title: Reports de la Recerca a Catalunya
» Site description: Informes sobre l'estat de la recerca a Catalunya en relació a paràmetres homologats internacionalment. De l'Institut d'Estudis Catalans.
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» Site title: Scientia Gerundensis
» Site description: Articles de revisió en les diverses àrees de biologia, geologia, química, física i matemàtiques publicats per la Facultat de Ciències de la UdG. Presentació, índex, suscripcions i normes de publicació.
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» Site title: Servei d'Arxiu de Ciència
» Site description: Directori d'arxius de documents científics i tècnics en els territoris de parla catalana, coordinat pel CEHIC i l'Arxiu General de la UAB.
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» Site title: Servei d'Investigació
» Site description: Presentació, comissió d'investigació, convocatòries, intruccions d'execució, legislació, impressos, tauló d'anuncis. De la UV.
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» Site title: Setmana de la Ciència
» Site description: Organitzada per la Universitat Politècnica de Catalunya (UPC). Durant els dies que dura les aules i els laboratoris de la Universitat acullen conferències, taules rodones, cursos, tallers i jornades de portes obertes, organitzats pels centres docents, de recerca i serveis.
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» Site title: Setmana de la Ciència
» Site description: Seu amb informació de les activitats, patrocinadors, col·laboradors, reculls de premsa, jocs, informació de les edicions anteriors i enllaços.
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» Site title: Xarxa científica
» Site description: Articles sobre ciència i tecnologia a la xarxa. Secció de REDcientífica i REDhumana.
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Randomize humor
When I was in high school I used to be terrified of my girlfriend''s father, who I believe suspected me of wanting to place my hands on his daughter''s chest. He would open the door and immediately affect a good-naturedly murderous expression, holding out a handshake that, when gripped, felt like it could squeeze carbon into diamonds
Now, years later, it is my turn to be the dad. Remembering how unfairly persecuted I felt when I would pick up my dates, I do my best ot make my daughter''s suitors feel even worse.
My motto: wilt them in the living room and they''ll stay wilted all night.
"So," I''ll call out jovially. "I see you have your nose pierced. Is that because you''re STUPID, or did you merely want to APPEAR stupid?"
As a dad, I have some basic rules, which I have carved into two stone tablets that I have on display in my living room.
Rule one: If you pull into my driveway and honk you''d better be delivering a package, because you''re sure as heck not picking anything up.
Rule two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter''s body, I will remove them.
Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don''t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to assure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric staple gun and fasten your trousers securely in place around your waist.
Rule Four: I''m sure you''ve been told that in today''s world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I WILL kill you.
Rule five: In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early".
Rule six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry.
Rule seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process which can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don''t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
Rule eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter. Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wodden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight, Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater and a goose down parka zipped up to her adam''s apple. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay. Hockey games are okay.
My daughter claims it embarrasses her to come downstairs and find me
attempting to get her date to recite these eight simple rules from memory. I''d be embarrassed too--there are only eight of them, for crying out loud! And, for the record, I did NOT suggest to one of these cretins that I''d have these rules tattooed on his arm if he couldn''t remember them. (I checked into it and the cost is prohibitive.) I merely told him that I thought writing the rules on his arm with a ball point might be inadequate--ink washes off--and that my wood burning set was probably a better alternative.
One time, when my wife caught me having one of my daughter''s would-be suitors practice pulling into the driveway, get out of the car, and go up to knock on the frond door (he had violated rule number one, so I figured he needed to run throught the drill a few dozen times) she asked me why I was being so hard on the boy. "Don''t you remember being that age?" she challenged.
Of course I remember. Why do you think I came up with the eight simple rules?
Humor of the day
Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON''T WALK".
Q: Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat?
A: In case she locks the keys in her car.
Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn''t wake up the sleeping pills.
Q: Why did God create blondes?
A: Because sheep can''t bring beer from the fridge.
Q: Why did God create brunettes?
A: Neither could the blondes.
Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A: So she wouldn''t get Hearing Aides.
Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
A: To turn the blinker off.
Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.
Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
A: To see what was on the other side.
Q: Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian?
A: Because she loved children.
Q: Why did the blonde take her typewriter to the doctor ??
A: She thought it was pregnant because missed a period.