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Randomize humor
A FRIEND OF MINE HAS AN 18 YEAR OLD SON NAMED LEROY. HE ATTENDS OAKLAND HIGH SCHOOL WHERE THEY TEACH EBONICS AS A SECOND LANGUAGE. LAST WEEK HE WAS GIVEN AN EASY HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT. ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS PUT EACH OF THE FOLLOWING WORDS IN A SENTENCE. THIS IS WHAT LEROY DID.
1. RECTUM: I HAD TWO CADILLACS, BUT MY OL''LADY RECTUM BOTH.
2. HOTEL: I GAVE MY GIRLFRIEND DA CRABS AND THE HOTEL EVERYBODY.
3. ODYSSEY: I TOLD MY BRO, YOU ODYSSEY THE JUGS ON THIS HOE.
4. STAIN: MY MOTHER-IN-LAW AXED IF I WAS STAIN FOR DINNER AGAIN.
5. SELDOM: MY COUSIN GAVE ME TWO TICKETS TO THE KNICKS GAME, SO I SELDOM.
6. PENIS: I WENT TO DA DOCTOR AND HE HANDED ME A CUP AND SAID PENIS.
7. CATACOMB: DON KING WAS AT THE FIGHT THE OTHER NIGHT, MAN, SOMEBODY GIVE THAT CATACOMB.
8. FORCLOSE: IF I PAY ALIMONY THIS MONTH, I''LL HAVE NO MONEY FORCLOSE.
9. UNDERMINE: THERE IS A FINE LOOKIN'' HOE LIVIN'' IN THE APARTMENT UNDERMINE.
10. TRIPOLI: I WAS GONNA BUY MY OLD LADY A BRA BUT I COULDN''T FINE NO TRIPOLI.
12. DISAPPOINTMENT: MY PAROLE OFFICER TOL ME IF I MISS DISAPPOINTMENT THEY GONNA SEND ME BACK TO THE BIG HOUSE.
13. INCOME: I JUST GOT IN BED WIT DEE HOE AND INCOME MY WIFE.
14. HONOR: AT THE RAPE TRIAL, THE JUDGE AXED MY BUDDY, WHO B HONOR FIRST?
15. FORTIFY: I AXED DA HOE HOW MUCH? AND SHE SAY FORTIFY.
16. ISRAEL: ALONSO TRIED TO SELL ME A ROLEX, I SAID MAN, THAT LOOKS FAKE. HE SAID, NO ISRAEL.
NEEDLESS TO SAY, LEROY GOT AN A.
Humor of the day
ARTERY--The study of fine paintings.
BARIUM--What you do when CPR fails.
BENIGN--What yoiu are after you be 8.
CAESAREAN SECTION--A district in Rome.
COLIC--A sheep dog.
COMA--A punctuation mark.
CONGENITAL--Friendly.
DILATE--To live longer.
FESTER--Quicker.
G.I. SERIES--Baseball game between teams of soldiers.
GRIPPE--A suitcase.
HANGNAIL--A coat hook.
MEDICAL STAFF--A Doctor''s cane.
MINOR OPERATION--Coal digging.
MORBID--A higher offer.
NODE--Was aware of.
ORGANIC--Church musician.
OUTPATIENT--A person who has fainted.
POST-OPERATIVE--A letter carrier.
PROTEIN--In favor of young people.
SECRETION--Hiding anything.
SEROLOGY--Study of English knighthood.
TABLET--A small table.
TUMOR--An extra pair.
URINE--Opposite of you''re out.
VARICOSE VEINS--Veins which are very close together.