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Randomize humor

THE BODY PARTS MEETING

One day the different parts of the body were having an argument to see which should be in charge:

The brain said "I do all the thinking so I''m the most important and I should be in charge."

The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so I''m the most important and I should be in charge."

The hands said: "Without me we wouldn''t be able to pick anything up or move anything. So I''m the most important and I should be in charge."

The stomach said: "I turn the food we eat into energy for the rest of you. Without me, we''d starve. So I''m the most important and I should be in charge."

The legs said: "Without me we wouldn''t be able to move anywhere. I''m the most important and I should be in charge."

Then the rectum said: "I think I should be in charge."
All the rest of the parts said: YOU?!!
You don''t do anything! You''re not as important as we are, surely!
You can''t be in charge!"

So the rectum closed up...
After a few days, the legs were all wobbly,
the stomach was all queasy,
the hands were all shaky,
the eyes were all watery,
and the brain was all cloudy.
They all agreed that they couldn''t take any more of this and agreed to put the rectum in charge.

The moral of the story?
You don''t have to be the most important to be in charge....
just an asshole!

Humor of the day

Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote?
A: Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?
A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook?
A She gets the pop tart out of the toaster in one piece.

Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
A: She threw it off a cliff.

Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.

Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?
A: Tell her she''s pregnant.
Q: What will she ask you?
A: "Is it mine?"

Q: What are the worst six years in a blonde''s life?
A: Third grade.

Q: What did the blonde get on her IQ test?
A: Saliva.

Q: What do you call 15 blondes in a circle?
A: A dope ring.