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Top Sites » Home » Cooking » Fruits_and_Vegetables » Apricots »
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» Site title: Apricot Balls
» Site description: Simple to make Christmas dessert.
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» Site title: Apricot Cream
» Site description: From CNN.com; uses fresh apricots.
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» Site title: Apricot Glace Pie
» Site description: Calls for canned apricots, pie shell, cornstarch, cream cheese, condensed milk, lemon juice, and vanilla.
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» Site title: Apricot Mustard Glaze
» Site description: Simple recipe made with apricot preserves and Dijon style mustard.
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» Site title: Apricot Nut Spread
» Site description: Made with dried apricots, cream cheese, and walnuts.
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» Site title: Apricot-Almond Bread
» Site description: Made with dried apricots, maple syrup, and almonds.
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» Site title: Chicken Apricot
» Site description: Uses canned apricot halves and includes brandy.
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» Site title: Green Bulk - Apricot Recipes
» Site description: Includes Apricot-Applesauce Cake, Chocolate Dipped Apricots, Apricot Pepper Jelly, and Apricot Pumpkin Muffins.
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» Site title: Spiced Apricot Sauce
» Site description: Made with apricot preserves, lemon juice, nutmeg, and cinnamon.
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Randomize humor
Two guys are out hunting deer...
The first guy says, "Did you see that?...pointing to the sky."
"No," the second guy says.
"Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead!" the first guy says.
"Oh," says the second guy.
A couple of minutes later, pointing to a far ridge, the first guy says, "Did you see that?"
"See what?" the second guy asks.
"Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there!"
"Yah, Ok", says the second guy again with a bit of irritation in his voice.
A few minutes later the first guy says: "Did you see that?"
This time pointing behind them.
By now, the second guy is getting very aggravated and says, "Yah, I SAW IT!"
And the first guy says: "Then why did you step in it?"
Humor of the day
December 26, 1999
Dear Santa,
You must be surprised that I''m writing to you today, the 26th of December. Well I would very much like to clear up certain things that have occurred since the beginning of the month, when, filled with illusion, I wrote you my letter.
I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set, a pair of roller blades, and a football uniform. I destroyed my brain studying the whole year. Not only was I the first in my class, but I had the best grades in the whole school.
I''m not going to lie to you, there was no one in my entire neighborhood that behaved better than me, with my parents, my brothers, my friends, and with my neighbors. I would go on errands, and even help the elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing within reach that I would not do for humanity.
What balls do you have leaving me a fucking yo-yo, a stupid whistle, and a pair of socks? What the fuck were you thinking you fat son of a bitch?!
That you have taken me for a sucker the whole fucking year to come out with some shit like this under the tree. As if you hadn''t fucked me enough, you gave that little faggot across the street so many toys that he can''t even walk into his house.
Don''t let me see you trying to fit your big ass down my chimney next year. I''ll fuck you up. I''ll throw rocks at those stupid reindeer and scare them away so you''ll have to walk back to the fucking North Pole, just like what I have to do now since you didn''t get me that fucking bike.
FUCK YOU SANTA. Next year you''ll find out how bad I can be, you FAT-SON-OF-A-BITCH!
Sincerely,
Little Johnny